I made my first fiction sale!!
Earlier this week my short story "The Filigree" was accepted by on-line science-fiction publication Atomjack Magazine, and it has just been e-published in Issue 9, the February 2008 issue!
This is a thrilling experience and I'm delighted to be able to share the story with everyone. It may be found and ingested for free at:
"The Filigree"
I would love for you to read it leave your comments here or let me know what you think in some fashion. I really do hope you enjoy it!!
11 comments:
I am so happy for you! (And selfishly, so very excited to finally read your work!)
My thoughts, since you asked:
The best thing I can say is that I was caught up in the story. I thought it would be difficult since I knew you had written it and I assumed I would be distracted by that. By the time Sarah and Nav get to their driver I was into it. This is to say that it became to me like any other well written published work.
The second best thing I can say is that it would have fit in with the omnibus of historical Sci-Fi short stories that a good friend of mine gave me. The setting was compelling, it never broke character and took itself seriously. As the story went on I was genuinely interested in what would happen if Sarah managed to escape death. I wasn't disappointed.
My only criticism: It seems to wrap up too quickly. Its almost as if you edited the ending for space. From the point that Sarah wakes up it seems to jump to conclusion too quickly. Navizan's last scene seemed to be rushed - it lacked the emotion of the scene at the falls. The way that people reacted to the filigrees with the ticking clocks was a great, in my opinion, unplumbed depth. Remember that this is just my opinion and I am someone who is still learning to appreciate pacing differently manifested than in my expectations.
Overall, I enjoyed the story very much and cant imagine that I wont be thinking about it for some time.
Congratulations!
Thank you for your comments! I think you make good points and love the honest feedback. And of course you enjoyed the story, so there's little more I can ask for :-)
What's a 'threegram'? - A 3-D hologram? I had to look up bathos and stochastic. Nice. I didn't get to finish the story the first time a sat down to read. I noticed that I was drawn back to it. It was the very first thing I did upon returning home.
I empathized with Sarah immediately, and could feel her frenzy, her desperation for self-preservation. I could feel the tension between her and Navi, and yet knew there was nothing he would deny her.
The world unfolded for me an infrequent sci-fi reader in layers of understanding, but never left me guessing for so long as to lose my interest. I enjoyed the unforeseen consequences revealed in the ending, but wished for more of an emotional impact - more of a final day for Navi. The beginning of the story showed Sarah's will to live in contrast to the Filigree and the idea of a dignified, well-ordered death. Navi's death held less meaning for me because it happened without the backdrop of internal or emotional struggle, and yet I didn't know him quite well enough to understand how he made his decision with so much peace of mind.
Amazing. You are amazing. And now I won't stop pestering you until I get to read the next.
hey, congratulations! I enjoyed your story. While reading it I thought it might have been interesting to play around with the order of the chapters/ sections. For instance if the part where she meets all the other dazed patients in the 'padded chamber' came right at the beginning. The way it stands I found it a little too linear and flat for my liking and, like the lives of the protagonists, you kind of know when it will end.
I would also beware of hackneyed terms like 'frenzied media' and 'run-of-the-mill operation' ( unless you like them of course ).
The idea is great and succinctly executed. You say a lot with few words and all in all it is very thought-provoking and provides something to relate to, since we all know we will die sooner or later.
Cheers
Mike
I love it!
I'm impressed with the way I automatically felt at home in Sarah and Navizian's world - what a different way to live it would be. How interesting!
The injection of some good honest physics gets the thumbs up too. Even though causality is a central pillar of the story, you've incorporated it into the story in such a way that it doesn't intrude.
Well done and congratulations.
PS After reading your causality dabbling I was going to recommend Charles Stross to you. However, having seen your blogspot username, I see you've already found him yourself :)
I was confused and not really sure what happened.
Could not see any point in your bringing in the Makuzo epsisode and how could Navizian commit suicide if his filigree gave him years?
Hello my anonymous friend! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
SPOILER WARNING
To answer your questions: The Makuzo episode was designed to establish the conceptual premise in the context of the main characters' emotional history.
The "success" of the experiment was to create a timeline in which the filigrees advertise a specific amount of remaining time for everyone on the planet, but no longer bind humans to it through the causality trap. Therefore, having freedom of choice but explicitly confronted with his own mortality, Navizian decided to end his life.
Hope this clarifies things a litte. Thanks for reading :-)
You wrote an interesting story there. It has good characterization, and tackles the difficult issues of time and causality. Well done,a nd congrats on this being your first published story (though I see you've sold another since).
and just in case you're wondering, I found your blog while looking for sf authors on "Authors Blogs".
Diane, thank you! I really appreciate the feedback and am delighted you read and enjoyed the story :-)
Congrats on your own publications! I can see you have a bunch of stories out there and have been at this for a while. Great example for me.
Yep, now sold three stories, the third of which is also available to read on-line: http://myaineko.blogspot.com/2008/07/new-story-available.html
Thanks again for taking the time to say Hi -- will you be at WorldCon?
Glad to hear another story of yours is available; I will definitely check it out. No, I won't be at WorldCon.
You have a lot of interesting things on your blog, by the way, and so I'm linking to it, if you don't mind.
Thanks -- I hope you like it!
Please, go right ahead and link; I'm glad there's material here you find of interest :-)
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